Sunday, February 22, 2009

Reflections on Relationships

I just got word that my uncle (one of two) has passed away today. This was my mother's brother who lived on the East Coast. He was 80 years old and suffereing from poor health age related issues.

This death has really caused me to ponder relationships - as I often do. I never really knew my uncle, aunt and his children that were my age. Yes, we were separated by a vast country inbetween the two coasts but we were more separated by emotional distance. My mother and her brother were not close but that was not without her efforts. She really has tried continuously over the years to connect with him. For some reason, he just didn't want to have a relationship with her. Maybe it was because of her faith/religion - her lifestyle that was a bit different from his. I'll never know.

He lived an interesting life, working for the CIA traveling the world. I bet he had some amazing stories - that my family may never know.

So we have family - life - relationships. I would have liked to have known my cousins while I was growing up. This is something that has always bothered me. I don't really know any of my cousins - two families on my mothers side and one on my fathers side. So sad.

I want so much for my children to have good relationships with each other - to be the aunts and uncles that I never have had. For my grandchildren, "the cousins" to truly know eachother, to have memories together and to value the blessing of family. So my quest is to have family unity - although we are struggling right now, it's my constant prayer that we can come together, as these children of ours mature, accept personal repsonsiblity and learn embrace truth and the Savior in their lives.

Here's a picture or two of the good old days ....... When life was much more simple and children were more willing to listen, trust and follow their mom and dad - who love them dearly.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Already February?

Wow, it's been 6 weeks since I posted. Okay, I'm a slacker I guess. Life has just taken over these past 6 weeks and well, to be honest -- I'm facebooking now -- what a terrible obsession. It's been incredibly wonderful to reconnect with people from my past though so....I am torn between blogging and facebook.

We had a wonderful Christmas back in Wisconsin, visiting Aunti Pami, Uncle John, Cousin Jeff and Grandma. Just me, devon, leah and hannah .. road tripping for 2 days there and 3 days back. We were only in Green Bay for 4 days but they were great.

Grandma's health is failing terribly and she has been in a nursing home since last march. It was heart breaking to see this once strong and contributing woman be so feeble and fragile. It was truly heart wrenching for us all. Pami brought her home each day to visit with us, eat lunch/dinner and nap.

My very biggest regret in all this? I waited TOO long to talk with mom about the details of her life. A while ago, I stared scanning her pictures and asking her the dates and names. We got up to the point that she married Doug - Devon's father. That is where it all ends. I am so very disappointed in myself -- that i did not make this "interview" more of a priority.
She has been such a big part of our lives, the lives of our children. While life was happening, we forgot to share the stories - reflect and recall. We had so much time with her to learn more about the woman she was (not just the grandma) and now it has slipped away. We are left to write the rest of her life story. Not the most terrible thing but how I wish it was HER words.
Don't wait..................get those stories while you can. Enough said.
The girls made elf costumes and accompanied Santa (john) for his various house visits on Christmas Eve. It was a simple and quiet, yet very special Christmas for us all.